SUICIDAL

Hello people, so I didn’t plan on writing on this today but something came on and my plans changed. I really hope you all can relate to this written word. This is for everybody out there with deep internal struggles, having to put up with facades. Always have the consolation that you’re never alone and someone else is going through worse than whatever you are facing.

SUICIDAL

In my supposed confusion…I wanted to say something else but I chose this instead…the world looking at it…standing on the roof top in my mind’s eye was…I lacked the word to describe it…I would probably go with your definition…pathetic and the probable antonyms would be…over bearing…seemingly hopeless…helpless…epileptic round about…i planned on going…on and on…only then did I realise like the hit of a thunder…that I determined what I saw…I alone controlled the binoculars with which I viewed the world with…but then again I felt weak…saddened with the thought that something else controlled me to control the world…critically trying to analyse…I let my situations make me…I let myself disbelief in myself and yes…I doubted myself more than I’ve ever doubted anyone in my life…whose fault was it…please tell me…the tears started dropping and before I knew it…I was screaming and shouting at the world…where did I go wrong?…why couldn’t creation give me something better?….I never chose this life you know…then the air…like a very still voice started speaking to me in whispers…You see the challenge in every problem rather than the opportunity…each time you look in the mirror…You see hopelessness…You see failure…And the mirror has no other choice than to serve your reflection back to you on your very own platter…gratitude is what you lack…appreciation is what you should be schooled on…mind control should be your pupil…challenges should be placed on every stair case you come across…so you could step on them…And life itself should you see as a privilege…no matter whatever you think you’re facing…have the consolation that someone else is facing worse…And someone else far worse that you could ever imagine….the very last thing I expect of you is to be SUICIDAL.