Love Wednesdays E2

“Hope is the thing with feathers, that perches in the soul, and sings the tune without the words, and never stops at all- Emily Dickinson

True love? Hopefully yes. I was 21 and she was 18. We didn’t go in due to the age difference, but then she decided we should. we were childhood friends separated as she moved to Mumbai. one day her family decided to visit. I saw her again after 6 years. I instantly felt she was the one. She gave me her number and Voila.

She studied at Wilson’s and I worked at The Oberoi. We were happy as can be. Her sister and mother and the kids loved me. We were family friends so they didn’t know about the relationship. I Planned to marry her. I couldn’t believe such happiness existed. We never fought. It was the most perfect love I ever felt. We did everything to make each other happy. We did our dirty bits and we had madly fallen. She gave me meaning and purpose. I never smiled but with her she forced me, I did. Whoa. I found myself.

One instance. I had too much pressure at work and there was this constant expectation. It was good but i was stressed. I told her i was going to resign. She had just done wrapping up in an audition. I used to live besides the Oberoi at Nariman Point. She came to the point and was sitting at the patio for me. she saw me from the distance and patted on the patio saying “sit” I went and sat and said I was sad. She pulled my head and rested my head on her shoulder. The weight just flew off. she asked me again. “Still wanna leave?” I couldn’t speak. I remember every single detail.

As life had it I was asked to force resign as I couldn’t handle one of my trainees and didn’t fulfill my responsibilities. So I came back to Goa.

We chatted everyday, talked on Skype, and what not. As to have it my family didn’t agree. They were worried about me and my job and my love life. Her family had marital issues but I didn’t care much. her sister married twice has a kid with each ex , her mother married twice, again two kids , her father had a string of relationships and 2 other families. weird ? Yes. Bothered me, not a bit. She was the most humble and beautiful girl I ever saw.

I told her about this, she wasn’t pleased. My father asked me if I have relationship with her , I denied, I knew he wouldn’t accept. He called her mother, who in turn asked her as to why I was denying the love. She spoke it out. that’s where everything fell apart. our families got distant. hated each other.

I lost the love of my life that day. It’s hard to understand. She came back telling me she was sorry. That she would wait. I told her to move on. I just had lost too much. after a year I pathetically go back to her does she accept? No. As life would have it she says she just hates me. she does, I get it.

She said I walked away and that I was like her father. Her friends told me she hasn’t moved on. but I understand it. It isn’t fair to make such a comeback. I felt she should’ve comeback and I can finally stand up and say to family that I do love her. Again it isn’t fair.

So as true love goes. I’ll still be searching for it hopefully. I think there are many true loves in life. You just have to understand everyone. It does come. You just have to hang on. Am I devastated and hung on ? Yes! but I am trying and I’m just going to keep the memories I guess.

Thomas Merton once wrote “Love is our true destiny. We do not find the meaning of life by ourselves alone. We find it with another.”

By Joel Rao

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What a story guys. I have my opinions which you’ll definitely see in the comment section after you drop yours. See you there😊