Hi guys, I know we’re on a break, a long one at that but I’m going to share a thing or two if I feel led to.
Today, I’ll be sharing an excerpt from an essay entry I wrote in March that helped me process a lot of things better and I strongly feel someone needs to hear this.
Fast forward, it’s the month of March in the year 2021, I’ve secured my admissions in Canada, I got a new job on the side, I am developing financially, spiritually, setting my priorities right, building my social network and capital. I think about my ex boyfriend everyday, some days, I get mood swings or shed a tear but regardless, I take it one day at a time with God. Time heals they say so I might as well allow time do its thing.
Thus, I dare say, “life is rejuvenated hope”. Human beings are built to chase after something be it God, career, love, a mission, purpose, calling etc. So if there’s no hope and then renewed hope in whatever direction, if there’s no strong belief showing positivity in that direction, which in turn makes clarity of your path vague or even unknown, life becomes meaningless. Frustration sets in, depression takes over, addiction, vices, suicide etc play out.
The year 2020 was a painful year. It was the year that defined life for me and showed me that I needed to be comfortable being alone in the storms of life because the possibilities of greatness can be shared but not the process. Would I want to take all the hurt back and have everything work out as planned? Yes, I would but again, no, I wouldn’t because I understand now that sometimes your pain is the sacrifice that births your new direction in the next phase of your life. It solves the one question life would always throw at you “What next?
Yesterday, I was reflecting on how far I’ve come and I remembered during the months of February till May 2021 when my 2020 wounds were just fresh and I was trying my best to just heal. This minute my feelings are good, the next, I’m taking a circular walk round my house, looking up to the sky with teary eyes and just speaking to God and I would say “ This is really hard, it’s tough this time” Some days I would let the tears drop, some days I’ll just be talking out to him and explaining how tough it is for me even if he already knows. Free therapy in itself.
The year is winding up, a lot is going to make you feel some type of way (heads up)and I miss having to share with you guys but best believe I’ll stop by when I can. Praying for healing and the love of God to fill your heart to anyone hurting.
If you didn’t listen to the last podcast where I shared a number of things and announced our break, find the link below.
Till I talk to you again.
With Love, Lois.